


All's Fair

by ShaneVansen



Category: Haven - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Episode Tag, Established Relationship, F/M, Introspection, UST, post-ep
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-13
Updated: 2012-11-13
Packaged: 2017-11-18 14:50:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/562249
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShaneVansen/pseuds/ShaneVansen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>All's fair in love and war.  Too bad nobody informed her heart of that.  (<i>Magic Hour II</i> post-ep)</p>
            </blockquote>





	All's Fair

**Author's Note:**

> And again, thanks to December21st, who insisted I make pronouns less confusing.
> 
> Nathan/Jordan established relationship, Audrey/Nathan UST (uh, sort of).
> 
> I'm taking some liberties with who knows what: for the purposes of this story, Jordan's aware of Audrey's abduction in _301_. Whether it's common knowledge, Nathan told her, or she's overheard something at the station/seen something in Nathan's office, just go with the fact that she knows. ;)

Jordan McKee is a lot of things, but stupid isn't one of them.

After she managed to get the truth out of Nathan in between dealing with that whole haunted house incident on Hallowe'en, she... well, she didn't _forgive_ him for lying to her, not exactly, but she chose not to make it the deciding factor as she weighed the idea of seeing where this relationship might lead against informing the Guard of what he was up to and letting him fend for himself. Part of it's that if there's a serial killer among her people then she wants to know about it, but Jordan can't deny that the opportunity to touch someone without causing pain is a motivating factor. It's been so long since she could touch anyone freely, since anyone could touch her, and the isolation is enough to drive a person crazy if she isn't careful.

The more she gets to know Nathan the more she sees what a terrible liar he is, so Jordan knows that he's telling the truth when he promises that this thing they have going on isn't part of his investigation any longer. She lets herself get caught up in his smile and the easy way he touches her and the feel of his lips against hers, and for a while, she tucks the rest of what she knows away in the back of her mind and just enjoys what they have.

She knows there's more to his relationship with Audrey Parker than simply being partners. She's heard enough to piece together that the detective's abductor is the same person Haven PD's calling the Bolt Gun Killer and she _knows_ that's a key reason why Nathan's trying so hard to find him. There are other things too, bits and pieces of rumours and half-overheard conversations and glimpses of notes on Nathan's desk that tell her that something bad is supposed to happen to Audrey, something with an approaching deadline, and Jordan's pretty sure he thinks the Guard is involved with that too. And the fact that police chiefs don't have partners but that Nathan still thinks of Audrey as his, that he drops everything the moment she needs him, and, well, Jordan isn't blind. For a while, she just opts to ignore it because whatever Nathan feels for his not-partner, he's choosing to be with _her_.

But then Nathan dies and all the denial in the world isn't going to work for her anymore.

It all comes crashing down when she witnesses exactly how much his death affects Audrey. The utterly distraught expression on her face, the way she threatens to kill Moira slowly if it will trigger her affliction so she can bring Nathan back, that would have been enough to tell Jordan everything she needed to know right there. But in those moments where they all thought Nathan wasn't coming back and Audrey confessed that she loves him, that she always has, heedless of witnesses – even if Jordan wanted to keep pretending, there was no way she could.

Part of Jordan wants to hate Audrey for making her face what she's been ignoring, but the clearly shaken woman steps aside and lets Jordan take her place next to Nathan; it doesn't look like she's going to try to get between them, in any sense of the phrase. Audrey, it seems, isn't going to interfere with what she must assume is a close relationship.

After that, Jordan has nothing for respect for the other woman. The hell of it is, she respects her so much that she knows that it's time to let Nathan go.

She comes to this decision in the hours after his resurrection, while he's off tracking down Tommy Bowen. It becomes all the more clear at his unofficial 'welcome back from the dead' party that Jordan's made the right choice when she notices that, even though he walks away from Audrey to be with her, his eyes continue to follow the detective any time she's in the room.

She'll still help him, still be his liaison with the Guard. It'll hurt (oh god, how it will hurt) to go back to the isolation, to see Nathan and talk to him and know exactly what she's missing, but she's always known deep down that he was never really hers. She blames no one but herself.

Jordan is not stupid. She can be selfish sometimes, and willfully ignorant when she wants to be, but she is not and never will be prepared to settle as second best.

The party's winding down, people starting to leave, and for a few moments she watches Nathan watching Audrey before leaning against the bar next to him.

"Nathan," she murmurs. "Want to take a walk?" The knot in her chest tightens when he looks down at her, because for all that she's not the one he really wants she knows that he feels _something_ for her, and this is going to be one of the hardest conversations she's ever had. 

"There's something I want to talk to you about."

_\--end--_

**Author's Note:**

> No spoilers for upcoming eps, thanks!


End file.
